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1983

Cookies

Sam arrives back in the Computer Room after completing his rounds and greets Penelope, asking if she is enjoying her dinner.  Seeing that she hasn’t eaten any of her food, he surmises that she is not very hungry.  He then turns to TXL and checks in with her, saying, “Crenshaw to computer!  Crenshaw to computer!  Come in, please!  Over!”

“Hello, Mr. Crenshaw!” she says.  “Have you completed your rounds?”

Sam explains that the store is “all locked up tight as a drum,” and then tells her that he will be having dinner upstairs, since Jodie brought a special meal from home for everyone.  He doesn’t know what Jodie is bringing because she is keeping it a surprise, but he hopes that she brings lots of it, because, “Starving starlings, I sure am hungry!”

Looking down at the large ceramic jar on the desk, Sam contemplates going into his emergency cookie supply to tide himself over.  TXL admonishes him not to, out of concern that he will spoil his dinner, but Sam is undeterred, explaining that he is hungry as a bear, while wondering if he filled the jar back up.  He takes the lid off to discover that he did, in fact, fill it up, and then eats one.

Up in the Children’s Department, Jeff is putting the finishing touches on a display as Jodie walks in.  She is carrying a large wicker basket in one hand, and a smaller paper bag in the other, and places both of them on the counter.  “Oh, great!” says Jeff.  “I’ve been looking forward to this all evening!”  He asks Jodie if there is anything that he can do to help, but Jodie has everything under control, as dinner is made.  However, she does ask him to go down to the basement and get Sam while she gets everything ready.  Jeff prepares to leave to get Sam, and then turns around and asks of Jodie, “Don’t start without Sam and me.”

Jodie says, with a chuckle, “Boy, that’s one thing about Jeff.  He may lose his magic hat every once in a while, but he never loses his appetite.”

Muffy arrives and tells Jodie, “Oh, hunger is making me weak in the knees.  I think I could eat a ton of blue cheese!”

Jodie explains to her that she won’t have to wait much longer, as Jeff had gone to get Sam.  When Muffy inquires about what Jodie brought, she explains that she brought salad, yogurt, hard boiled eggs, and, for Muffy, a block of cheese.  She also brought vegetables, and for dessert, tangerines, grapes, and bananas.

“To prepare all of this must have taken you hours,” says Muffy.  “If only I’d known, I’d have thanked you with flowers.”

Jodie appreciates the sentiment, but she explains that she just wanted to make sure that everyone had a good meal – especially Sam.

“Oh, that Sam always gobbles up too much junk food.” remarks Muffy.  “He gulps down whole mouthfuls without having chewed!”

“I know,” says Jodie.  “I worry about Sam.  He doesn’t seem to care what he eats as long as it tastes good and fills him up.”

Muffy says, with a chuckle, “Sam doesn’t dine.  He simply attacks.”  She then inquires about what is in the brown paper bag.  As it turns out, the bag contains cookies for Jodie’s nephew Davy, whose birthday is tomorrow.  She is dropping them off on her way home from work.

“Cookies are something we all like to eat.  They really provide a most wonderful treat,” says Muffy.

Jodie agrees.  “But I don’t eat them very often, Muffy.  The trouble with cookies is that once you start eating them, you just can’t stop.  Well, at least I can’t, anyway.”  She then wishes that Sam and Jeff would hurry, as she’s getting hungry, too.

“If we wait much longer, we’re going to grow thinner,” laments Muffy.  “Jodie, let’s go to the roof and serve dinner!”

Jodie likes that idea, and agrees to do it.  She packs up the food to take to the roof, and assumes that by the time they’re ready to eat, Sam and Jeff will be back, and they can just come down and get them, and tell them that they’re going to “have a picnic under the stars.”  Jodie and Muffy leave, taking the basket with them, leaving the bag of cookies on the counter.

Next, we see the Mime Lady standing behind three paper bags.  She wants to play a game with us.  She shows us that one bag is full of cookies.  She then shows that the other two bags are empty.  The Mime then rearranges the bags, and has us guess which bag contains the cookies.  First, the Mime checks the bag in the middle position, where the cookies were previously, to reveal that the bag in that spot is empty.  She then shows us that the cookies are in the left position.  She then rearranges the bags, and we guess again.  The cookies aren’t in the right or the left position, so the middle bag must contain the cookies.  The Mime reaches in and, much to TXL’s surprise, she pulls out a bunch of grapes.  She laughs.  When TXL asks what hapened to the bag of cookies, the Mime reaches behind to reveal the bag of cookies.  “Cookie Lady, you tricked us!” says TXL, as the Mime laughs again.

Back in the Children’s Department, Jeff arrives, with Sam, snacking on his emergency cookies, following behind him.  He is surprised that the department is empty, as Jodie was supposed to be there.  He explained that she had two large bags right on the counter.  Jeff turns to us and says, “I don’t suppose you know where Jodie is.”  We tell him that she’s on the roof.  “She’s up on the roof?  I wonder why she’s up there,” he says in a perplexed tone.

Sam, after licking his fingers, says, “Look, whatever the reason, she must have left our dinner right here.  This must be it.  I guess she took the other bag over to Muffy’s.  Come on, Jeff, let’s just dig right in here…”

Jeff stops Sam, putting his hand over the bag, suggesting that they wait for Jodie.

Sam protests, “Jeff, if I don’t get some dinner pretty soon, I’m going to faint clean away from hunger!  What’s the matter?  I thought you were hungry, too!”

“I am,” says Jeff.  “I’m starving!”

“Well, then?” asks Sam.  “What are we standing here gabbing for?  Let’s eat!” and he starts to open the bag.

Jeff begins to rationalize things.  “Oh, I suppose it’s okay.  Jodie did bring two bags from home.  I guess this one is our dinner!”

Sam, having opened the bag, is delighted to discover that it is full of cookies.  “Crispy crumbling crackers, would you look at this!  Cookies!  My favorite dinner food in the whole world!”

Jeff is amazed, but admits, “I’ve never eaten cookies for dinner before.”

As they begin to eat, they sing praises of cookies, naming different kinds of cookies.

After a nursery rhyme, we see crumbs all over the counter, the bag of cookies is completely empty, and Sam and Jeff are both regretting their choices.  “Oh, Sam,” says Jeff, “we shouldn’t have eaten all those cookies.  I don’t feel very well.”

“Me, neither, Jeff,” says Sam.  “Me, neither.  As a matter of fact, I haven’t felt this bad since we sailed the Tradewind Tramp through that typhoon.  Yeah, it was terrible.  Everybody got seasick, as I recall.  Well, the waves kept tossing the boat up and down, and up and down, and up…”

“Oh, Sam,” pleads Jeff, “no more seasick stories, please?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry, Jeff,” he says.

Jodie and Muffy arrive, and Jodie quickly notices the condition that the two of them are in.  “Sam?  Jeff?  What’s the matter?  You look terrible!”

Sam turns to Jodie and says, “So long, Jodie!  You take care of Penelope for me, and it’s been nice knowing you.”

“Sam, what is it?  Jeff?” asks Jodie, as they both let out a groan.  “Muffy, there’s something wrong here.  Look at these two.  They look really sick!”

Muffy, having investigated around, says, “Oh, who wouldn’t look a bit green around the eyes after eating a whole bag of cookies this size!”

“WHAT?!?” shouts Jodie, in disbelief, taking the bag.  “Oh, no!  Sam, Jeff, those cookies weren’t for you.  They were for my little nephew Davy’s birthday party!”

“Jodie, Jodie, we’re sorry,” says Jeff.  “We thought they were our dinner.”

“Oh, great,” says Jodie.  “Well, all I can say is Davy’s going to be awfully disappointed when I have to tell him that somebody ate all his birthday cookies.”

Muffy is angry at Jeff and Sam.  “It’s all your fault!  You’re both to blame!  These cookies weren’t yours.  For shame, for shame!”

Jodie tells Muffy not to be mad at them, because they feel badly enough already.  She then suggests that she and Muffy go up to the roof to have dinner, and she and Muffy leave.

Jeff turns to Sam and tells him, “Sam, we’ve made a terrible mistake.”

“Mmhmm, you can say that again!” says Sam, with a hiccup.

Up on the roof, Jodie and Muffy are having their dinner.  “Mmmmmm.  This dinner you’ve made is simply delightful.  But, Jodie, I’ve noticed you’ve not touched a biteful!” says Muffy.

Jodie has lost her appetite, because she is preoccupied with Davy’s lost cookies.  She had promised to bring a large batch of cookies to the party, and now, with the cookies gone and its being too late to make more, she can’t fulfill her promise, which will leave Davy disappointed.  “If only Sam and Jeff had waited, none of this would have happened.”

“Oh, if you ask me, you’re being too kind!” says Muffy, somewhat angrily.  “I’d have given those two a piece of my mind!”

Jodie, however, isn’t mad at them.  She knows that they didn’t know that the cookies were not for them, but is still amazed that they actually ate an entire bag of cookies like that.  She’s also not surprised that they’re feeling sick.  She imagines that Jeff won’t do that again, but, noting Sam’e regular eating habits, she isn’t so sure about whether Sam would again.

Then Jeff comes up onto the roof.  When Jodie and Muffy hear him calling, they turn away, silently.  He then says, “I’m sorry.  I’m sorry that Sam and I ate all of the cookies that you made for Davy’s party.  But, uh, you see, well, we were both so hungry, and your, your cookies, well, they tasted so good, well, we just couldn’t stop eating.  Uh, I’m sorry.  Now, we’re, we’re both sorry.  I guess, uh, you don’t want to be my friend anymore.”

Jodie motions for Jeff to come over.  “Come over here, Jeff,” she says.  She’s not mad at him, and she still wants to be his friend, but she does have something to say to him.  She explains in song about sharing, and how sharing is one way to show that you care about someone.  “Think about others, it’s only fair, think about others, remember to share!” she sings.

Jeff is relieved, and promises to remember to share in the future.  Jodie is confident that he will.

Next, we hear a story called “Buff’s Reward”.  In the story, the Richards family had rented a cabin for their holiday, and Buff, their dog, and Emma enjoyed playing in the snow.  After building a snow castle, Emma suggested that she and Buff go in to warm up.  Emma suggests that her parents give Buff a cookie, considering all of his work building a snow castle, but her mother explains that cookies are not good for dogs.  Buff was disappointed about not being allowed to have a cookie, curling up under a table and laying with his head on his paws.  After having hot chocolate and cookies, Emma went back outside.  When she went out, an avalanche began, burying her in the snow.  Buff came out and rescued Emma, much to her parents’ delight.  That evening, Buff got his reward: a special cookie made out of hamburger and dog biscuits.

Back in the Computer Room, Sam is attempting to make himself feel better by drinking a glass of fizzy water.  He admits that he overdid it, as he has quite a stomachache now.  He drinks the water, saying, “Over the teeth and past the gums!  Look out, tummy, ’cause here it comes!”  He makes some noises after finishing, remarking that the stuff tastes funny.  However, he does feel better.  He also admits that he really messed up, telling Jeff to eat the cookies.  However, he’s not sure how to make it up to Jodie.  He then has an idea: what if he paid for the cookies?

Muffy arrives, and disabuses Sam of that notion.  “A handful of money is just not enough.  That’s the fact of the matter, or my name’s not Muff.”

Sam agrees.  However, he is concerned that he’s ruined his relationship with Jodie, and hopes that she doesn’t blame Jeff, because, Jeff told him to wait.

“Jodie’s upset and troubled, that’s true,” says Muffy.  “But she’s really not angry with either of you.  Those were birthday cookies for Davy’s big day.  Now she just doesn’t know what she’s going to say.”

Sam can’t stand the idea of his being the one who spoiled Davy’s birthday.  “I guess I’d better start off by telling Jodie I’m sorry, huh?”

“Fine, see you later.  I’ll be back in a while,” says Muffy.  “I just thought of a way to make Davy smile!”  She then rushes off, leaving Sam perplexed about what she is up to.

In the Children’s Department, Jeff is sitting on the steps with Jodie’s picnic basket.  He asks us, “Do you like cookies?  Me, too.  But you know what I’ve discovered?  If you eat too many, you feel terrible.  Oh, I don’t think I’ll ever eat cookies for dinner again.”

Just then, Sam walks in, eating a cookie.  “Hi, there, Jeff!” he says.  “Still feeling a bit under the weather, are you?”

“Sam!” says Jeff, astonished.  “You’re still eating!”

“Oh, yeah,” says Sam.  Yeah, but this isn’t really eating, you know.  More like nibbling.  Besides, I had a glass of fizzy water, and that kind of fixed me right up.”  He then asks where Jodie is, as he wants to apologize.

Jeff explains that she went to wash her hands.  Meanwhile, Jeff was going to find a bag to pack up the leftovers.  Sam thinks that it’s a shame to let the food go to waste, and offers to share a tangerine with Jeff.  Jeff is not interested, and sings about how stuffed he is, how bloated he feels, how tight his trousers fit, and how much pain his stomach is in.

As Jeff finishes singing, Sam is still thinking about food until he realizes that he shouldn’t be, and that he’s not even really hungry.  He realizes that he needs to stop stuffing himself.  He excuses himself to do something that he should have done a long time ago.

Meanwhile, Muffy is at her house, and she is baking.  She invites us to guess what she is working on.  “There are some mice who are really quite sweet.  You can nibble their noses, and munch on their feet.”  She also tells us that these mice are delicious with milk, and are fond of the oven.  They like heat, and tan to a golden brown color on a baking sheet.  Muffy then reveals for us to see that the mice in question are cookies.

Back in the Children’s Department, Jeff is using the old cookie bag for the leftovers.  Jodie certainly didn’t expect to be taking the bag home again.  She also tells Jeff that she’s not looking forward to telling Davy about the lack of cookies.  Just then, Sam comes in, and, with Jeff’s help, puts his cookie jar on the counter.  He apologizes, and then after Jodie accepts, he continues, saying, “No, no, no, no, there’s no excuse.  Even if Jeff and I didn’t know you made those cookies for your nephew’s birthday, well, at least I should have known better than to eat them all at once.”  He then offers his emergency cookie supply to Jodie to take to Davy’s birthday.  Sam continues, “I learned something about myself tonight.  My eating habits are getting out of hand!”  He realizes that he’s always snacking, and figures that if his cookies aren’t around, he won’t be tempted to eat so much.

Jodie approves, and hopes that Sam sticks with his decision.  She also isn’t worried that the jar is not full, because it’s the thought that counts.

Then Muffy pops up and says, “Well, the thought is what counts, yes, that’s very true.  I have something here for your little nephew.  I made it for Davy.  It’s just a small gift.  But it’s still far too heavy for this mouse to lift!”  Jeff helps Muffy lift the object, a small tin, onto the counter, and invites everyone to take a look.  Jodie opens the tin, and she is delighted to find the mouse-shaped cookies.  Muffy offers one to try, much to Jodie’s delight.  She and Muffy split one, Jodie offers one to Sam, and then retracts her offer, remembering his commitment to better eating, and Jeff declines.

“No thanks, Jodie,” he says.  “I don’t think I’ll be eating cookies for a long, long time.


Quizzes:

  • Who did Jodie make the cookies for?  Sam and Jeff, Davy, or Muffy?  (Davy.)

Nursery Rhyme:

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